Joseph C. Brewer
- Apr 2, 1985 - May 3, 2022
In Loving Memory of my extraordinary brother, Joseph C. Brewer
“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, when one only remembers to turn on the light.” -J.K. Rowling
Main Info
Joseph “Joey” Brewer will always be my beloved brother.
Joey and I grew up in Wisconsin where we spent most of our days playing basketball, in the snow, and living out our happy, fun childhood with our amazing family and friends that surrounded us.
Joey was the most unique soul that would bring a smile to your face just by entering a room. His personality was genuine, and I never heard my brother speak ill of a single soul or tell a lie my entire life.
One of my many memories of Joey that exemplifies his character and moral turpitude was when our family dog, Shadow, passed away and two years later we decided to get another dog for the family. Joey was so disappointed to think that we could ever “replace” Shadow and move on from his memory.
This was symbolic of many actions from my brother where he was extremely loyal to those he loved and would never replace them. His kind heart would not even allow him to harm something as small as an insect that made its way into his home. He would gather the ant or spider and make sure that it made its way to safety outside. All animals and children loved his presence and would immediately flock to him.
He shared with me that one day he would have liked to have children of his own. Joey was not only the sweetest soul I ever knew, but he was also the most disciplined. He had the ability to transform his body into a powerhouse at any given moment, staying away from toxic food and only eating ones that he felt would benefit him the most to achieve his goals.
His intelligence, capabilities, and personality gave him everything he would have ever needed to stay in this world, but he was not able to see it that way.
On May 3rd, 2022, at 7:30 am, I received a text message from my mom showing concerns about my brother. I was not sure what to think of it and called 911 to go to his house since it was going to take me a little longer to get there. We were all shocked and in disbelief to learn the news of my brother’s passing from suicide.
As I arrived at the house, I ran to go inside, but the police would not allow me to say goodbye to my brother. Crippling pain overtook my mind and body as I tried to understand how we got to this point.
At this time, I was 6 months pregnant and knew that I had to remain as calm as possible for the baby’s safety. The devastation left behind by my brother has spread throughout our family and friends.
The should of’s, would of’s, and could of’s have been at an all-time high and the guilt mixed with grief has done its fair share of damage to our family.
If the pain that Joey had been going through was anything like what we are feeling in the absence of him, I will dedicate my life to helping those that are feeling the way Joey did and to do everything in my power to keep them here in this world.
One word that he shared with me a few days before his passing was “hopeless.” This word echoes in my mind and has caused me to find my new purpose in life which is to bring hope to the hopeless and make sure they know there is help if they seek it.
The Just Help Out Foundation is there for anyone who may be in a dark place in their life and we are dedicated to bringing them out of the darkness and into the light.
Love Letter From Mom
“How blessed am I to have such a handsome, intelligent, athletic, kind, big-hearted, thoughtful, extremely funny young man to call my son.”
Dearest Joey,
On April 2nd, 1985, the most adorable baby boy was born, and that was you. I named you Joseph, but you were a Joey to me.
Throughout the years, you always had Mama’s love and undivided attention.
There did come a time where you wanted your mama’s attention to be a little less noticeable due to my outgoing personality that would sometimes embarrass you.
Lol No matter what, you knew I would be there.
I was there for you in an instant to help you with whatever you needed. I’ve never known you to ask me for anything in your 37 years.
As I look back, I wish that you would have.
I was always so proud to look into your beautiful brown eyes and think, “That tall, dark, and handsome young man is mine.” How blessed am I to have such a handsome, intelligent, athletic, kind, big-hearted, thoughtful,
extremely funny young man to call my son.
Somewhere in your being was also a sad, hurt, and heartbroken soul with a lack of belief in oneself and confidence that took you from me.
The morning of May 3rd, 2022, started out with you not feeling well, but we discussed the situation, and I reassured you that we would figure it out and that I always had your back. I told you how much I love you and that this month is all about Joey.
I knew things were bothering you; I just did not realize how bad they were. We hugged, and I felt your love.
Within the next 15 minutes or so, my life became a tragedy that I could never imagine was even a possibility.
As I try typing the rest of this nightmare, I cannot even see the keyboard due to the tears that are pouring out. I will never be the same.
Life has taken a dramatic turn since you left.
I struggle each day to keep moving forward, so that is where your sister Nichole (or Nick, as you would call her), Derek, and my adorable grandsons Joseph and Vinny come in. They give me purpose—the purpose I lost on May 3rd.
Nichole and Derek are struggling as well. It was a morning that will never leave us. We all miss you so much in our everyday lives. We always bring you into our discussions; we have a lot of stories where we know exactly what you would say in that moment.
It puts a big smile on our faces and gives us a second of peace. We will take one second of peace if it helps us in anyway.
I hope you are safe and happy in heaven with God. I know you are with Grandpa Joe (Dada) and Auntie Kak and the rest of our beautiful family that God has blessed us with.
When my time on earth comes to an end, promise me that you will be the one to greet me with open arms and a tight hug that you will never let go.
I hope I’ve expressed how much I adore you, Joey.
I love you forever and beyond,
Kathie, Joey’s mom
Love Letter From Dad
“Family was everything to Joey. His zest for family games never faltered. He taught us many ideals throughout his life and would be humbled by me saying son.”
My beloved son.
I miss you so much. Your loss has left a huge hole in my heart.
My son was the ultimate truth seeker. He would turn over any stone to get to the answer he would seek.
As his father, I would accept many things in the world as they were. But Joey would look beyond and question everything. Many times, convincing all of us to look at things from a different view point, many times being right.
Family was everything to Joey. His zest for family games never faltered. His quest for healthy foods never ended, and has stayed with me till this day. He taught us many ideals throughout his life and would be humbled by me saying so.
My main regrets are running out of time with him and not reaching out to him in his darkest hour. This world is a hard world, and your heart was so big.
Heaven has that place reserved for as kind of soul as you were on earth.
Our loss is the angel’s gain. You and I have memories longer than the road that stretches out ahead.
Spread your wings and fly away, far away. He’s on his way home, he’s going home!